Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
