I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
