Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
Randomize
