I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
