I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
