At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
