I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Randomize
