Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
