i just had sex bonerless
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
