mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
