I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
She told me I should be a condom model.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize