Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
