GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Randomize