You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
