She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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