I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
