Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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