hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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