So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize