Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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