is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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