Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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