i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
This is my gift to your gina
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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