I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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