She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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