I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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