Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Randomize
