With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
