Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
