If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
then he tried to convert me to islam
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
