i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Randomize
