that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
