my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
