I didn't shave. On purpose
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
