They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
