Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
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