Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
