I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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