Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
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