seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize
