i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
Randomize
