Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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