Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I understand Curling. That high.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
