There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
