Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
