a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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