butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Randomize
