Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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