Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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