Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
