fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Randomize
