Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Randomize
