Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
look no pants
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
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