Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I will pee on everything he values.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Randomize
