Christians are straight up FREAKS
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Randomize
